Jon and Kate Gosselin, TV parents of 8-year-old twins and 5-year-old sextuplets, announced last night on their reality show plans to dissolve their 10-year marriage. No more Jon and Kate, just Jon or Kate. They will take turns parenting their eight children in their now famous million-dollar Pennsylvania mansion.
As America watched and fans tweeted their trepidation, the heart of America was revealed. Most people, whether Christian or Jew, Muslim or Mormon, agnostic or atheist, or any other label shared a note of sadness for the breakup of the family, especially for the kids. God wired us this way. But then the rationalizations begin. It will bring peace. Life will be better. They will be happier. Hogwash.
I can speak to this because I have been divorced. It is not God's perfect design. Yes, God allows it. Yes, He may still bless in spite of it, as He has me, for He abounds in mercy and compassion. But was His original intent for men and women to become one flesh, have children and part ways? Certainly not.
Parenting experts told “Good Morning America” the separation will be difficult for the children. I must admit I am often amused when so-called experts state the obvious. GMA parenting contributor Anne Pleshette Murphy said the split would pose “a real challenge” and represent “a really hard time for the kids.” Did anyone really think it wouldn't?
ABC News also reports the words of relationship expert Terry Real, who says this is just reality coming to reality TV. He believes that Jon and Kate have “an opportunity to be real role models. … We can watch them put their egos aside and be good co-parents.” Given the choice between good co-parents and bad co-parents, certainly I prefer the former. But there is another option–surrender to God and let Him show the world on reality TV how He can remedy any marriage.
Their desire to serve themselves first, seeking their own peace and happiness over God's plan and their children's welfare, stands in opposition to the concept of surrender. Yet it is in surrendering to God and His plan that we experience true peace.
Additionally, Real shared something noteworthy for all of us. He said regarding couples in general, “A lot of men are afraid of their wives; a lot of men are passive.” Could this imply that a lack of adherence to traditional roles negatively impacts a marriage?
If we would just open the Bible rather than looking to the world for answers. As Prego says about their pasta sauces, “It's in there!”
Endnote: If you or someone you know needs hope regarding marriage, please visit: http://hopeformarriages.com. God restored the marriage of Jeff and Cheryl Scruggs after seven years of being divorced. “The things that are impossible with people are possible with God” (Luke 18:27).