Review of Cecil Murphey’s ’When a Man You Love Was Abused’

“A book that encourages and instructs women by delving into a topic not many men easily admit or care to discuss and reveals the power of grace and unconditional love.”

How can a woman reach, support, or help the man she loves who has experienced the most heinous of tragedies, childhood sexual molestation? The answer is found in I Peter 3:2 “While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.”

When we think of child molestation, our hearts sink into sadness for the child. But what of these children who grow to adulthood? What sadness is left behind in them only to re-emerge through behaviors that stifle emotional connections, cripple their ability to trust, and leave them scarred and broken? How are women to respond to the men they love who are crippled by the sins of others?

In this book, Cecil Murphey reveals his personal story of childhood molestation and how, with the grace shown to him by his wife Shirley and others, helps others to know how to encourage and deal with the men in their lives that suffer silently.

There are two parts to this book. The first, Part One: Who He Is, focuses on the various behavior patterns of those who’ve suffered abuse. The second, Part Two: How You Can Help, provides the reader with specific ways to respond to the men they love before and during the healing process.

Women will find insight and wisdom in this book. Women will also find the indestructible power of unconditional love in the example of the author’s wife, Shirley Murphey and how she loved the author through his healing.

I met Cecil Murphey recently and found him to be quite genuine. I heard him speak about this book and wanted to read and review it. This issue has not touched my life, but in reading it I gained a new knowledge of the depth of pain and wickedness in this world and the power of what can help in overcoming it – the strength and wisdom of a godly woman.

Because of his desire to help other survivors, he has launched a blog at Men Shattering the Silence. To discover more about Cecil Murphey, visit his website at The Man Behind the Words. A needed book, I recommend it highly.

433535: When A Man You Love Was Abused: A Woman"s Guide to Helping Him Overcome Childhood Sexual Molestation When A Man You Love Was Abused: A Woman’s Guide to Helping Him Overcome Childhood Sexual Molestation By Cecil Murphey / Kregel Publications

# Paperback: 256 pages # Publisher: Kregel Publications (April 7, 2010) # Language: English # ISBN-10: 0825433533 # ISBN-13: 978-0825433535

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  1. Cec Murphey said:

    Thank you for your fine review of a book that was painful to write and difficult to sell to publishers. Reviews like yours make it easier to talk to people about male sexual abuse–which is far more common than most people realize.

    August 24, 2010

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