Several issues divided my friend from her family and neither would budge an inch. No one expected her untimely death. It left her family with dozens of conflicting emotions.
I heard the weeping and wailing at the funeral home.
“I loved her. I am sorry. I wish we hadn’t quarrelled.”
“I should have done more. I should have gone to see her. “
“I should have…I should have…I should have…I should have…”
But they didn’t.
Only when it was too late did they say all the things they should have said all those years before.
Most of us have experienced similar circumstances. Is there a way to deal with it? What can we do when relationships are cut off? Well first of all we should do what we can to make peace.
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. (Romans 12:18, NIV)
And if the other person refuses your offers of peace: as always, the Bible gives the answer.
David married King Saul’s daughter and was best friends with Jonathon, Saul’s son. Saul tried to break up these relationships, bad-mouthed David, plotted against him, and even tried to kill him.
David had good reason to be angry at Saul. However, when Saul died in battle, this is how David responded: he grieved, called his men to fast and pray, wrote a mourning song for Saul, and told the nation to memorize it. All this is recorded in 2 Samuel 1:17-27.
Then David and all the men with him took hold of their clothes and tore them. They mourned and wept and fasted till evening for Saul and his son Jonathan. (2 Samuel 1:11-12a, NIV)
When life (or death) places us in unresolved circumstances, we can do what David did. He dwelt on the best of what he knew, and spoke love, praise, and kindness about his former enemy.
Now we know what to do if it ever happens to us.
Prayer: Lord, if we have left it too late, give us the grace to do what David did, or, at the very least, help us to keep our mouths shut. For Christ’s sake. Amen.