Shortly after Ron’s death, I had to cancel his life. The world of government waits for no man (or woman.) Papers must be signed. Health cards and licenses cancelled and pensions reorganized. The funeral home folks and the government agencies made it all seem so easy.
I did it alone, not because I am some sort of spiritual warrior but because I wanted to. It seemed to me that those things were personal and private, and deserved a wifely touch.
I warn you, it does make the pain more intense. Until I did all this paper work, part of me could pretend it wasn't so.
However on paper, my Honey is now in the past tense. He used to be a fellow who needed health insurance, a driving license, and a passport.
In my heart he lives very much in the present. He is the man who hugged me, encouraged me, cared for me, fathered my children and loved me unconditionally.
Now that he is gone, who will do that for me? Am I (and every other widow/widower) to be alone for ever? No.
Isaiah 54:4-5 “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. For your Maker is your husband— the LORD Almighty is his name— the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth.
Prayer: Father God, thank you for hope. Amen.
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