My parents raised me to be a y’all using, grits-eating, horse-riding Southern Baptist kind of girl. We attended church every Sunday, Girls in Action (GA’s) every Wednesday night, Bible drills, and youth camps. To say that I was exposed to religion would be an understatement. Y’all might say I was sopping in it– like a biscuit smothered in red-eye gravy.
Yet there seemed to be a snag in the fabric of this little girl’s life. Once I reached the age of 19, this God girl chose sin instead of her Savior. She chose suffering instead of saving. I should have high-tailed it as fast as I could away from sin, but instead I flirted with it, I tested it, and I pushed its limits. I was dressing like a Christian, looking like a Christian, proclaiming to be a Christian, but certainly not acting like a Christian.
Why did I think the opposite side of the street apart from God would be sunnier? Did I take my blessings for granted because I got used to them? Did I get too comfy in those cherry wood pews?
I used to be the Bible drill queen. I could locate any book of the Bible in six seconds flat, but my head knowledge never truly became heart knowledge. This girl chose sin because she knew informational religion instead of transformational relationship.
Why did this good girl choose sin?
Somehow, somewhere, I ceased to be amazed by an all-powerful, all-mighty God. I never denied myself. I never gave until it hurt. I didn’t trust God the way he calls us too. I got comfortable and lazy. I sat in the pew of a megachurch because that’s what good girls did. I wore my control-top pantyhose, sear sucker dress, and oversized hat because my mamma told me to. After a while a girl becomes more amazed by the cutie sitting in the back of the church than what’s going on in the front of the church.
Sin will always be around trying to lure and entice us.
Unfortunately, for me, tragedy had to strike before I woke up from my sin stupor. I had to learn denial of self 101 the hard way. God allowed extreme hardships in my life so that today I could stand in absolute awe of Him, never ceasing to be amazed.
My prayer for this New Year is that even though we may want to sin, we will deny ourselves instead. We will be determined to pursue absolute devotion and radical obedience. And most importantly, I pray we will NEVER EVER cease to be amazed by our awesome God (Romans 6:12-14).